- Following the well-intended advice of a friend or family member. Everybody has his or her own ‘legal’ opinion of how a divorce should end up. This is usually based on seeing how a friend’s or family member’s experience went. Some of what they say may be correct, but remember that each divorce, like a fingerprint, is unique. No one else has your kids, your situation, your concerns! Don’t take on false expectations from well-meaning but misinformed sources.
- Thinking if you go to court you will get to fully tell your side of the story and that the Judge will therefore punish your spouse for being a bad person. Here is how it typically happens in a divorce hearing: you each will be given approximately 20 minutes each to please your case. The Judge will not be interested in why your spouse is a bad person, or why your life has been turned upside down. The Judge will not hand out punishment in a divorce case.
- Assuming a judge can make a better decision than you can! It never ceases to amaze us how often two reasonably normal and decent people would rather let a judge in a court of law determine how their children will be parented. An agreement the judge IMPOSES on you will NEVER be better than one you and your spouse can come up with in mediation.
