This is no longer a hurdle. If one or both parties are unable to come to the mediator due to distance restrictions, then the mediators will hold mediation via Zoom. While the majority of parties that use our mediation services prefer to come in person, many mediations are held via Zoom as well. Zoom is very effective and works well.

This would not likely be the case; in fact, the opposite is true. The more conflict and or complicated a situation the better mediation works! Statistically only 3% of the cases that we start ever end up needing to involve the courts. This is because the mediators spend time with the couple focusing their anger and frustration and helping them realize that the more control they have in the agreement reaching process the better the agreement will be for both of them. When you let a judge and attorneys make the decisions for you, then there is a greater chance that the outcome will create even more conflict. This would explain why over 35% of all litigated divorce cases end up back in court.

It is rare that mediation will not result in an agreement that both parties feel comfortable with. However, when this does happen it is usually because of unwillingness from one or both people and that may be as a result of false expectations that have been generated from a friend or family member or maybe even because of high emotions that cannot be reasonably addressed. One option after the parties have gone through the discovery process of their litigation, they certify the case for trial. At the trial scheduling conference with the judge, they can request a judicial settlement conference. This can be helpful when one party has false expectations, because it is another judge who does the favor for the judge assigned to the case. The non assigned judge will meet with the parties and their attorneys and discuss what he/she would do if the case were in his/her court. The non assigned judge then acts as a mediator to help the parties reach at least a partial agreement. This often helps a party with false expectations begin to appreciate what may happen if they continue to trial.

At the end of the mediation the mediators will prepare a document called a “memorandum of understanding” or “mediation agreement” this document will include all the agreements the couple made throughout the mediation. This document will be signed and notarized as a legally binding document. It is a contract between the couple. In order for the courts to recognize the agreement as a divorce, it must be converted into a “decree of divorce,” which the judge signs. This is the accepted format by the courts. It usually means that the “mediation agreement” is used as an overlay or template to create the decree. Everything that is in the mediation agreement will be in the decree and vice versa. The “mediation agreement” is filed with the proposed decree to show the court that the parties have agreed to what is in the proposed decree.

When a couple decides to use attorneys and the courts to handle their divorce, they are paying them to do all of the work. In mediation the couple will be expected to do a lot of the work. This means the process will take much less time. If a couple wants to keep some control over the process and outcome and are willing to commit to spending some time in mediation trying to find common ground and reach a fair agreement, they will find that mediation costs significantly less than litigation.

First of all, there are no mediation firms doing complete divorce mediations for a nominal cost. There are several “document preparation” services that are done by both paralegals and even attorneys that will prepare the basic minimum required documents by the courts. Further, it is unlikely this fee would include the $320 filing fee. There is no mediation! You must have complete agreement on all issues. There is not any opportunity to discuss options or alternatives. Most of the time couples choose this service trying to save money. 89% of these types of divorces have major problems in the future and often end up back in court. If this happens, the modifications can be very costly in both time and money.

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Collaborative Law is a recent concept where the attorneys agree to represent a divorce client but also insist that they will not continue representation if the case ends up in litigation. In theory the concept is very close to mediation and has had some success in resolving cases out of court.

i.            Pros –

1.            It uses a model of alternative dispute resolution similar to mediation.

2.            If successful, the parties will not have to go to court, saving time and money.

3.            The attorneys are committed to get a resolution that both parties are comfortable with and eliminate endless fighting like an adversarial attorney would do.

ii.            Cons –

1.            Both parties must have attorneys that agree to the collaborative law terms. If not, then the process will not work.

2.            Attorneys are trained to be advocates and may have a difficult time “changing hats” to be collaborative. It goes against everything they are taught. Only the most open-minded attorneys can be successful and even then, they need training and skills to be a mediator.
Bottom line: Mediation is still a more proven process and finding two attorney’s to play by the rules of collaboration may be difficult. Mediation will likely cost less and take much less time as well.

This is the number one question asked of us by divorcing couples. If you have been married for any reasonable amount of time and especially if you have minor children, then you should know that the decision to get divorced and how that divorce will be done is a huge, life altering decision.

Cost and duration obviously depend on the level of conflict and/or level of complexity that is in the divorce. Mediation is considerably less than going through the legal process using adversarial attorneys (See Litigation vs. Mediation). Schedule a free consultation with one of the mediators and they will ask you some specific questions about your situation and be able to help you understand the amount of time that will possibly be needed for your divorce.